10 Steps to Divorce

As the saying goes, "Sometimes, the only way out is through." The road to divorce can be long and filled with reflection and contemplation. Once you’ve decided to move forward, it is helpful to have a map that outlines the journey so that you will know what to expect. Though each situation is unique and can be impacted by your state’s laws, here are 10 common steps to divorce.

1. Pre-filing Preparations

As you prepare to start divorce proceedings, you will want to ready yourself and gather your team. Divorce ranks as one of the most stressful potential life events we can experience. It can be costly, take up a lot of time, and can be painful for you and those you hold dear. It helps to have a strong support system in place from the beginning. To start, think about your situation and those around you who may be affected. It might be useful to seek a therapist or mentor during this period who can help you cope with emotions that will arise along the way. This is also a good time to start researching lawyers and learning from others who have been there to better understand the experience.

2. Filing For A Divorce

The legal process officially begins when a complaint is filed in the county where you reside as a couple. While this can be done by either spouse without an attorney, many opt for legal counsel to help ensure that the paperwork is filled out correctly and that it best reflects their interests.

3. Serving the Papers

Once the paperwork has been processed, it must be officially served to the other partner. Upon receipt, the mandatory waiting period imposed by the court will be initiated. Papers can be served by a sheriff, process server, or personal delivery.

4. Response to the Complaint

On average, the other party will have 20 to 30 days to respond to the divorce papers by contesting or agreeing. The length of time varies by state. In Georgia, it’s 30 days, while Texas requires you to respond by 10am on the Monday following the 20th day. If they do not respond formally, getting a judge to agree to a default divorce may be possible. Your local and state statutes will determine the time to respond, so it is important to consult an attorney for the most relevant information.

5. Discovery

In this phase, both parties exchange information, financial documents, and anything pertinent to the proceedings. Your lawyers will often handle this.

Things can be more or less complicated than you expect.

6. Mediations and Negotiations

Courts often encourage parties to work out as many issues as possible outside official proceedings. Agreeing with your soon-to-be former spouse can save you considerable time and money, and leave the courts free to handle other cases. When dissension persists, a mediator can arbitrate negotiations and help you and the other party come to an agreement. This can take several weeks or even months, depending on how severe the disagreements are and how committed both parties are to settling out of court.

7. Temporary Orders

Courts may opt to impose certain obligations on both parties during pre-trial arbitration. This most often comes into play when custody of children is involved, and they need legal protections to ensure they have a safe and stable home.

8. Trial or Final Hearing

When attempts to reach an agreement fail, both parties will appear before a judge. This process can vary quite a bit in length. The legal proceedings themselves could take hours and, if the court is busy with a backlog of cases, it could take weeks or months before you can set a date. The delays can also add up if either party doesn’t show, which can push things until a rescheduled date can be set.

9. Issuance of Final Judgment

Once the disputes have been settled, there will be a final hearing, during which the judge will finalize the divorce and lay out specific terms. The time needed to get a final hearing may vary based on the backlog of cases, the specific judge in charge of the proceedings, and the location where everything occurs.

10. Post-Decree Actions

Even when the divorce is finalized, follow-up actions may still be needed. This is particularly true if a large estate is being divided or children are involved. Custody negotiations can last for years and can be adjusted over time in response to life circumstances, such as moving to a new state. Dividing property may require selling it and using an agreed-upon method to distribute the funds.

Your Roadmap

Each situation is unique. As you prepare for the divorce process, it is important to know that things can be more or less complicated than you expect. Understanding each step of the process and having the right attorney by your side can help you prepare for the journey ahead.